October 15, 2007 3:48 pm : Comments 000
Is it just me who can’t help start singing “Rice-A-Roni, the San Francisco Treat” every time I hear the bell of a San Francisco cable car? The commercial hasn’t aired in years yet every time I visit the City by the Bay it still keeps playing in my head over-and-over-and-over…
Is there a clinic that treats Rice-A-Roni Jingle on the Brain?
Now repeat after me:
Rice-A-Roni, the San Francisco Treat. Rice-A-Roni the flavor can’t be beat…
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10:10 am : Comments 001
Were it not for the Twin Pine Casino on the far edge of town, Middletown, CA could easily be mistaken for Smalltown, USA. There are no Starbucks, no Applebees, and no McDonalds to satisfy the coffee and junk food whims of local residents. There are no Targets, no Macy’s, and no 7-Elevens to be found. The town’s main drag, Calistoga Street (a.k.a. Highway 29), is a mere mile long. There are plenty of available parking spaces and you’ll never see anyone hustling-and-bustling by you on the sidewalk as they pound away on their BlackBerry or Motorola Q. Toto, we are definitely NOT in New York anymore.
Allow me to play Travel Guide
Locals tell me that Middletown, so-called because it was a resting place for stagecoaches traveling between Calistoga and Clear Lake, had long been dominated by extremist “America Love It or Leave It”, far-right Bible-thumpers. In earlier days, however, it attracted a less godly crowd. The treacherous road through Mount St. Helena into town was once the preferred launching site for countless stagecoach robberies. While police haven’t reported too many horse-drawn hijacks in recent decades, there’s still trouble to be found if you know where to look… or what to ask for. A few years ago, I had the audacity to ask this heavily tattooed, motorcycle-leather-wearing, menacing-looking guy working the register at the local gas mart if they sold contact lens solution. He let me know with one threatening glare that “real men” don’t wear contact lenses, at least not in Middletown.
But alas, that may no longer be the case. Middletown has been quietly undergoing a transformation in recent years. The area is increasingly becoming popular with artists, artisans, and New Age people who appreciate the area’s mountainous beauty, peaceful tranquility, and ideal climate (well, except for winter when it rains a lot). The 1600+ acre Harbin Hot Springs resort has become the biggest employer in the area and a wealthy high tech entrepreneur is launching a New Age time-share. The long-timers don’t care much for the newer arrivals, but they live a peaceful co-existence. Think of this place as a rural Switzerland for the left and the right.
Middletown may be small, but it boasts some eating and drinking establishments worthy of note. There is an upscale restaurant called Boar’s Breath, which is run by a couple named Frank and Suzette Stephenson. Frank, the chef, prefers to laden his dishes with lots of butter and cream (no tofu and sprouts here), so the selection is extremely limited if you are on a low fat diet. Frank served a steak special one evening that was as good as any I’ve had at New York’s best brasseries. What also impresses me about this place is how they mix drinks – It’s one of the few places I’ve ever been to where they take the time and effort to chill a martini bone cold. They also serve some excellent wines by the glass, including those from nearby Langtry Estate & Vineyards (which now incorporates those formerly under the Guenoc Estates label).
Two other must-tries are the gourmet coffee shop called Mugshots Espresso and a specialty sandwich shop called La Sirena (go for the tuna salad sandwich!). A woman named Diana, who emigrated to Middletown from Holland, owns both. Although there is nowhere to buy a daily copy of The New York Times in Middletown, a copy of the Sunday edition is delivered each week to Mugshots. Consider yourself forewarned: You will have to fight me for it when I’m in town.
Middletown’s supermarket, Hardesters, is also the town’s hardware store. I can’t speak much to the quality of their lugnuts and wrenches, but their fresh produce is far superior to what you would expect at some of the best gourmet food stores in New York. Granted, this is California, so maybe that’s not exactly a big surprise. Hardesters has a pretty extensive selection of gourmet food and other products, including – thank goodness – contact lens solution. Another great feature: there are no lines at the checkout, one of my pet peeves. I wish I could shop here every day.
If you are a beer aficionado, The Mount St. Helena Brewing Company is definitely worth checking out. The restaurant and bar brews its award-winning beers on site that are served up for a mere $2 a pint on nights when football games are on. The place also serves a pretty darn good chicken parmigiana sandwich and the pizza also looks pretty tasty. Unfortunately, I will probably forever remember this restaurant as the place where I watched the Yankees’ pathetic 2007 series ending loss to the Cleveland Indians (not that anyone in the place cared but me). The restaurant’s owners are looking for a beer distributor, so if you know someone in the business, maybe you can help them out.
If you are looking to spend the night in the Middletown area, I highly recommend Spirit Lake Bed and Breakfast about 20 miles north, which is run by an engaging couple named Peter and Elaine Marie. They bought and built their property after seeing an ad in the Penny Saver News. You would be hard pressed to find anyone who will make you feel more welcome than Peter and Elaine. As an example of just how small the world really is, they also own a B&B in Hawaii that, as it turns out, is literally next door to my cousin’s house!
However, all is not ideal ideal in Middletown, like most places. The town and surrounding area are vexed by chronic unemployment, which is being blamed, at least in part, for the growing drug problem. Crystal meth labs are rampant here, creating a virulent colony of drug addicts who need to beg, borrow, and steal to feed their addictions. Diane informed me last week that she has to remove seating she had put in front of her sandwich shop because it had become a place of choice for these drug addicts to congregate.
Peter and Elaine aside, many people in the Middletown area are not particularly friendly or welcoming of outsiders. To be fair, that’s a common enough reaction among the Old Guard whenever a town’s humble character and quiet way of life are perceived as threatened by aggressive land development and the resulting influx of new residents. My colleague Jackie sees the same thing happening in her backyard down by Princeton, NJ (it pains me to admit this, but Jackie is actually a born and bred Jersey Girl).
Having lived in New York City for nearly 20 years, I’ve grown somewhat immune to standoffish locals, so I can deal with chilly Middletowners and not let their somewhat icy demeanor dampen my affinity for their town. Next time you are in the Napa Valley region, it’s worth the 20-minute drive up Mount St. Helena to check out Middletown and the Lake County region. Just make sure you’re well-rested. The dangerously steep and winding road leading into town is a real doozy that would test even the great Grand Prix racer Jackie Stewart’s driving skills!
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